It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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