Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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