I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
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