I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
