OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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