that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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