She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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