trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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