I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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