An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
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i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
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what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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