Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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