So drunk its hurt
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
