We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize