I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize