it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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