Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
