idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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