I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I smell like Dick and happiness
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
