I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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