I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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