And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
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All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
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Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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