Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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