Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
