I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
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I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
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If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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