i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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