Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
