There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize