if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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