break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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