the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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