Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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