Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
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