found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
someone owes me an orgasm
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
she pinky promised me she was 18
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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