I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Randomize
