And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
