How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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