please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
