she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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