my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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