So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Green mimosas i think yes
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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