ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
