Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though