SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?