We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
