WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
She swung at the pinata with crutches
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
