problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
