A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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