Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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