does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize