North Korea, Best Korea!
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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