I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
