i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
